Twelve ways to remember a good cat

1. Mark their sun spot

Every cat had one: the square of floor by the window at ten in the morning, the top of the dryer, the corner of the bed. A small stone, a plant, or simply a rule that nothing else goes there. The house keeps a shape of them.

2. Their collar and bell on a hook

Hung by the door, where you will brush it now and then. The bell is the one sound in the house that only ever meant them.

3. A plot in Fern Hollow

This one is ours. Fern Hollow is the cat garden of the meadow: dappled shade, ferns that hold the cool, sun on the stones. A cat gets a permanent plot there with their photographs and their story, at an address you can share with anyone who loved them. It is free and never deleted. The keeper is still laying the paths in Fern Hollow, so a plot can be planted there today and its walk will open when the grounds are ready; until then the day's walk sets out from Willow Run and stops at cats too. Plant a plot for your cat.

4. A paw print or a nose print

Many vets and crematories will make a paw print if you ask, and a nose print from a clear photo can be engraved onto a pendant or an ornament. Cat noses are small and particular; it is a good likeness.

5. A portrait, from the photo that was most them

Not the prettiest photo. The one with the look. Cat people know exactly which one that is. A painted or drawn portrait from it will outlast every phone you own.

6. The window left as it was

If they had a perch, leave it a while. Some families put a bird feeder outside that window, which is a memorial with a small sense of humor, and the birds seem to know.

7. A plant in their name, but not a lily

Lilies are dangerous to cats, and many families kept them out of the house for years for that reason. Plant something else: catmint, rosemary, a small tree. Green every spring, and safe for whoever curls up under it next.

8. A shadow box

Collar, tag, the toy mouse they carried around at three in the morning, one great photo, behind glass. It keeps the things you cannot throw away from living in a drawer.

9. A small altar at home

A shelf with their photo, their collar, and a candle you light on their days. Nearly every culture has kept some version of this, and it costs nothing. The keeper has a fuller note on making one.

10. A donation to the shelter, or to the cats still outside

To the rescue they came from, or to a group that feeds and fixes the strays in your town. A memorial that another cat eats.

11. Write to them

The eulogy for a cat is hard because so much of the relationship was silent. Write down the silent things: the chirp at the door, the head against your chin, the way they knew when you were sick. In the meadow their plot's story holds unlimited words. If you need somewhere to start, the old lines work for cats too, whatever they say about dogs.

12. Mark their days

Their gotcha day, and the day they left. Light the candle, tell one story at dinner, let the house be quiet for a minute. On a tended plot in the meadow the keeper does this with you: she lights their candle every year on the days you choose, so the day is kept even when life is loud. The office explains tending.

However you remember them

Most families keep two or three of these: one in the house, one outside, one on the calendar. If one of them is a place in the meadow, it is free, it takes ten minutes, and it will be here whenever the others fade. Make a place for your cat, or read fifteen ways families remember any pet.